Amending my broken heart.

she ask me how I want to end this year - "I try to make this kind and clear...Just a chance that we'll find better days"...It is funny to think that now, 6 months ago I was death but alive in darkness numbing the nights and days living in routine of mediocrity forgetting myself what,who I was.Making everyday little by little just to get by for the next day absolutely sure about something but at same time have no fucking idea what exactly was going on. I sit in a room full of noise but felt in complete silence while staring at a wall that seems to collapse left feeling empty like fool, lost but what truly scares me the most honestly was not knowing I was in trouble in a maybe depression that I continue to fight like a soldier in battle.A war that always seems to get the best of me but knowing that I was becoming someone who I was not that was a terrifying feeling!!.The question was what would I say to them when they ask for the reason of my problem?If i myself wanted to know what was happening when and how I decided to forget myself forget that I was ALIVE!!!pathetic is the fact that I let them get to me.A doctor he would probably recommend some sort of prescription pill or therapy that's what they all do right right ?Whatever I said would not change anything but it would bring more damage more lost and a deeper depression.... Don't you ever think to yourself maybe is just some event or something that had to happen... Well one thing i find out with all this is that the people you care the most are the first ones sometimes to leave you when you need them the most but I guess no Surprise!there. I am still trying to figure it out something’s but is different now Well,for now i will just amend my heart a heart that is patient and enjoy life to the fullest! I never took the time to mend my heart but I will enjoy it and keep it light."Broken hearts happen when we open them up to be loved. Its inevitable. However...without opening ourselves up to pain, we will never experience the joy"Well,here's to closure to this.